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Thread: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

  1. #1
    Forum Hero Буржуй's Avatar
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    Default Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Here is a little test that will help you decide.

    Question: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans, and Rednecks?

    The answer can be found by posing the following question:

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal ..40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

    What do you do?

    *********************

    Democrat's Answer:

    Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

    Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

    Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

    Could we run away?

    What does my wife think?

    What about the kids?

    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

    What does the law say about this situation?

    Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

    Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

    Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

    Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

    If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

    Should I call 911?

    Why is this street so deserted?

    We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

    This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.

    **************************

    Republican's Answer:

    BANG!

    ****************************

    Redneck's Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading).

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click

    Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"
    Barack Obama on his girls: "I have men with guns surrounding them at all times, which I'm perfectly happy with..." (c) Why can he protect his family with guns and I can't?

  2. #2
    Never Ever Land Astrix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    первыйнах
    Communism!

    alcahb.gif alcahb.gif

    BANG! BANG!
    BANG! BANG!
    BANG! BANG!

    в зюзю, оливье, матрешка, лапти, BANG! BANG!, в салат alcahb.gif
    Why you must drink and drive, when you can smoke and fly?

  3. #3
    Forum Hero Буржуй's Avatar
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    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Quote Originally Posted by Astrix View Post
    первыйнах
    Цоммунисм!

    alcahb.gif alcahb.gif

    БАНГ! БАНГ!
    БАНГ! БАНГ!
    БАНГ! БАНГ!

    в зюзю, оливье, матрешка, лапти, БАНГ! БАНГ!, в салат alcahb.gif
    Реднек.

    П.С. Я могу очень легко представить себе как моя дочка мне говорит "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points"
    Barack Obama on his girls: "I have men with guns surrounding them at all times, which I'm perfectly happy with..." (c) Why can he protect his family with guns and I can't?

  4. #4
    Never Ever Land Astrix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Quote Originally Posted by ИнкЖирик View Post
    Реднек.

    П.С. Я могу очень легко представить себе как моя дочка мне говорит "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points"
    это хорошо или плохо? :shy:
    Why you must drink and drive, when you can smoke and fly?

  5. #5
    Forum Hero Буржуй's Avatar
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    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Quote Originally Posted by Astrix View Post
    это хорошо или плохо? :шы:
    Хорошо конечноже.
    Barack Obama on his girls: "I have men with guns surrounding them at all times, which I'm perfectly happy with..." (c) Why can he protect his family with guns and I can't?

  6. #6
    Never Ever Land Astrix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Quote Originally Posted by ИнкЖирик View Post
    Хорошо конечноже.
    ужОс
    Why you must drink and drive, when you can smoke and fly?

  7. #7
    VIP Screw101's Avatar
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    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Quote Originally Posted by ИнкЖирик View Post
    Here is a little test that will help you decide.

    Question: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans, and Rednecks?

    The answer can be found by posing the following question:

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal ..40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

    What do you do?

    *********************

    Democrat's Answer:

    Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

    Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

    Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

    Could we run away?

    What does my wife think?

    What about the kids?

    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

    What does the law say about this situation?

    Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

    Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

    Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

    Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

    If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

    Should I call 911?

    Why is this street so deserted?

    We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

    This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.

    **************************

    Republican's Answer:

    BANG!

    ****************************

    Redneck's Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading).

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click

    Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"
    Dude, what redneck site did you get this crap from?

  8. #8

    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Quote Originally Posted by Screw101 View Post
    Dude, what redneck site did you get this crap from?
    Скорее всего с Бруклинской версии реднека: www.нйгвидо.com :grum:
    "Ты Смешно читал? Почитай." (ц Бегемот)

  9. #9
    VIP Screw101's Avatar
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    Default Re: Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Redneck? (ENG)

    Quote Originally Posted by zgorynych View Post
    Скорее всего с Бруклинской версии реднека: www.нйгвидо.com :grum:
    Address not found.

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