> > WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)
> >>
> >>
> >> To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our
> >> own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something
> >> to make you chuckle. Whenever your children are out of control, you
> >> can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not
> >> extend to His own children After creating heaven and earth, God
> >> created Adam and Eve.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> And the first thing he said was "DON'T!"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Don't what?" Adam replied.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit?
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit!!!!!"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "No Way!"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Yes, way!"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Why"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why
> >> He hadn't stopped creation after making elephants. A few minutes
> >> later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Uh huh," Adam replied.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Then why did you?" said the Father.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "I don't know," said Eve.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "She started it!" Adam said
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Did not!"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "Did too!"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "DID NOT!"
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and
> >> Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it
> >> has never changed.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom
> >> and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be
> >> a piece of cake for you?
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> 1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk
> >> and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and
> >> shut up.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> 2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> 3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> 4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for
> >> word what you shouldn't have said in the first place.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> 5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind
> >> yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> 6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> 7. Just when you redecorate their room into a nice TV room, they show
> >> up with boxes, suitcases and large dogs, to move back home.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> ADVICE FOR THE DAY:
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> AND FINALLY:
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS
> >> ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!