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Мандаринка
06-23-2008, 01:30 PM
:)

If we could shrink the earth's population

If we could shrink the earth's population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all the existing human ratios remaining the same, it would look something like the following. There would be:

57 Asians

21 Europeans

14 from the Western Hemisphere, both north and south

8 would be Africans

52 would be female

48 would be male

70 would be non-white
30 would be white

70 would be non-Christian
30 would be Christian

89 would be heterosexual
11 would be homosexual

6 people would possess 59% of the entire world's wealth and all 6 would be from the United States.

80 would live in substandard housing

70 would be unable to read

50 would suffer from malnutrition

(ONE)1 would be near death;

(ONE)1 would be near birth;

(ONE)1 (yes, only 1) would have a college education;

(ONE)1 (yes, only 1) would own a computer.

When one considers our world from such a compressed perspective, the need for acceptance, understanding and education becomes glaringly apparent.

And, therefore . . .

If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep, you are richer than 75% of this world.

If you woke up this morning with more health than illness, you are more blessed than the million who will not survive this week.

If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace, you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death, you are more blessed than three billion people in the world.

If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation, you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.

If you hold up your head with a smile on your face and are truly thankful, you are blessed because the majority can, but most do not.

If you can read this message, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world who cannot read at all.

As you read this and are reminded how life is in the rest of the world, remember just how blessed you really are!

Мандаринка
06-23-2008, 01:34 PM
Toddler Property Laws

:grum:

1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my hand, Its mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, It's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
6. If I am doing or building something,all the pieces are mine.
7. If it looks like mine, it is mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If it's broken, it's yours.

MaximKamerer
06-23-2008, 02:16 PM
Toddler Property Laws

:grum:

1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my hand, Its mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, It's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
6. If I am doing or building something,all the pieces are mine.
7. If it looks like mine, it is mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If it's broken, it's yours.
ну так в мире всё точно так же

Мандаринка
06-24-2008, 12:34 AM
У меня детей нет, но я прослезилась.

The Price of Children

This is just too good not to pass on to all. Something absolutely positive for a change. I have repeatedly seen the breakdown of the cost of raising a child, but this is the first time I have seen the rewards listed this way. It's nice, The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition. But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into:

· $8,896.66 a year,
· $741.3 month, or * $171.08 a week.
· That's a mere $24.24 a day!
· Just over a dollar an hour.

Still, you might think the best financial advice is don't have children if you want to be "rich." Actually, it is just the opposite.

What do you get for your $160,140?

Naming rights. First, middle, and last!
Glimpses of God every day.
Giggles under the covers every night.
More love than your heart can hold.
Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
A hand to hold, usually covered with jelly or chocolate.
A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites
Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.
For $160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to:

finger-paint,
carve pumpkins,
play hide-and-seek,
catch lightning bugs, and
never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse to:
keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,
watching Saturday morning cartoons,
going to Disney movies, and
wishing on stars.
You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.
For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:

retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,
taking the training wheels off a bike,
removing a splinter,
filling a wading pool,
coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.
You get a front row seat to history to witness the:

· first step,
· first word,
· first bra,
· first date, and
· first time behind the wheel.

You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren. You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.

In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits.

So . . one day they will like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal for the price!!!!!!!

Love & enjoy your children & grandchildren!!!!!!!

Fofinha
06-24-2008, 12:56 AM
Awwwwe! I feel so happy right now.... :leader: :cheer:

Мандаринка
08-13-2008, 04:10 PM
Вредные советы для непослушных детей (послушным детям читать запрещается )

Если друг на день рожденья
Пригласил тебя к себе,
Ты оставь подарок дома -
Пригодится самому.
Сесть старайся рядом с тортом.
В разговоры не вступай.
Ты во время разговора
Вдвое меньше съешь конфет.
Выбирай куски поменьше,
Чтоб быстрее проглотить.
Не хватай салат руками,
Ложкой больше зачерпнешь.
Если вдруг дадут орехи,
Сыпь их бережно в карман,
Но не прячь туда варенье -
Сложно будет вынимать.

fan_ta
08-13-2008, 04:18 PM
A woman walks into the Mangere Social Welfare Office, trailed by 15 kids.
“WOW,” the social worker exclaims, “are they all yours?”

“Yes they are all mine,” the flustered Mother sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, “Sit down Rangi.” All the children rush to find seats.

Well,” says the social worker, “then you must be here to sign up. I’ll need all your children’s names.”

“This one’s my oldest; he is Rangi.”

“OK, and who’s next?”

“Well, this one, he is Rangi, also.”

The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through the oldest four, all boys, all named Rangi. Then she is introduced to the eldest girl, named Rangi! “All right,” says the caseworker. “I’m seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL named Rangi?”

Their Mother replied, “Well, yes-it makes it easier. When it’s time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, ‘Rangi!’ An’ when it’s time for dinner, I just yell ‘Rangi!’ an’ they all come running. An’ if I need to stop the kid who’s running into the street, I just yell Rangi’ and all of them stop. It’s the smartest idea I ever had, namin’ them all Rangi.”

The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, “But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch?”

“Then I call them by their last names.”