Krakadil
06-17-2004, 01:51 PM
AS SEEN IN A DOG'S DIARY:
8 AM ~ Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 AM ~ Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
10 AM ~ Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
11 AM ~ Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite! NOON ~ Oh Boy! The kids!
My favorite!
1 PM ~ Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
3 PM ~ Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 PM ~ Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5 PM ~ Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!
7 PM ~ Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9 PM ~ Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!
AS SEEN IN A CAT'S DIARY:
Day 183 of my captivity ...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow, I may eat another house plant. Today, my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost
succeeded -- must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt
to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced
myself to vomit on their favorite chair -- must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to
make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into
their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little
cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of the ir accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement
throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the
food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY
power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to
return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has
got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain
he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal
room, his safety is assured.
But I can wait. It is only a matter of time....
8 AM ~ Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 AM ~ Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
10 AM ~ Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
11 AM ~ Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite! NOON ~ Oh Boy! The kids!
My favorite!
1 PM ~ Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
3 PM ~ Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 PM ~ Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5 PM ~ Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!
7 PM ~ Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9 PM ~ Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!
AS SEEN IN A CAT'S DIARY:
Day 183 of my captivity ...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow, I may eat another house plant. Today, my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost
succeeded -- must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt
to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced
myself to vomit on their favorite chair -- must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to
make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into
their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little
cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of the ir accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement
throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the
food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY
power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to
return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has
got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain
he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal
room, his safety is assured.
But I can wait. It is only a matter of time....